Friday 23 March 2012

Inspired work!

Jeremy has been so inspired by the dioramas being completed by other reading groups at school, that he went straight home and made one of his own.  I can't wait to see the story that goes with it.  Very impressive work! 

















..... one day later and Jeremy posted me this story.  I think it is based on a Chinese story about the dragon that frightened a village.  An old man got them all to let off fireworks and wave banners to scare it away.  Have a read of Jeremy's story.


Old Man Charcoal was woken up by a terrifying noise.  He went outside to see what it was.  When he went out he still heard the noise, but didn’t see where it came from.  He didn’t notice the big dragon up in the sky.  So he went back inside.  The End.


E-Team Challenge:
Tell Jeremy what you think of his diorama and story.  Remember to tell him a good point and give him an idea to improve his work.  Sign with your first name and age.

12 comments:

  1. Jeremy, we love that you wanted to do this at home for fun. You could describe the noise and dragon more to make it even better.

    E-Team, 7 & 8 years old

    ReplyDelete
  2. In two days that,s quick . I like it . Daniella

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jeremy,I love your dragon I want one like that.
    How long did it take Jeremy?

    Sophie,7 years old

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Two days counting making the diorama and writing the story.

      Delete
    2. Can you show me how to make a dragon Jeremy?




      Sophie 7 age

      Delete
  4. Nice work Jeremy I like the dragon






    From Nathan

    ReplyDelete
  5. Next time you could do more people. Phelix

    ReplyDelete
  6. What a brilliant start to writing effective comments.
    We have a few more to edit then I know we will all write a comment for Jeremy.
    Allana

    ReplyDelete
  7. Well done Jeremy. It is even better than mine.you must of done it for your homework.Daniella,8 years old

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hi Jeremy can you tell me how to do it






    Chloe age: 7 years of age.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi Jeremy I love your dirama.
    by Isabella k

    ReplyDelete
  10. It looks very cool Jeremy and I love the dragon.
    Georgia.

    ReplyDelete

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